she was a 2....and a legitimate 2. like, helen keller is a 1, this girl...2.
You were running around the house covered in syrup, with shredded down pillow feathers on your body screaming "AFLACK!" at everyone
he just wrote my ten page research paper for tit pics. i love my boobs.
She's hidden vodka up her skirt and is riding a parking meter. Things can only get better
i've never seen someone face fit so perfectly in a toilet bowl
I just feel like I should give it a rest. I'm too old to be drinking bottles of grey goose and falling into koi ponds.
He's asking if he can send a dick pic. How do I politely decline that?
We celebrated International Women's Day by spending $700 and taking our tops off at the strip club
The boys offered to pay but we went halfs because we're feminists
I said that I'm avoiding parties and guys, and the freshman girl just laughed
You owe me beer. On another note, I made out with the ups guy at work today ....
Give me 20 minutes.. I'm going to need to start off with an orgasm to get through this day
This weekend I turned down sex to watch the Star Wars marathon... Is this growing up?
But what we lack in money, we make up for in dry humor and drugs
wyd
Laying here debating on if i want a sandwich or an orgasm.
Call me Sherlock Holmes, bitch.
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