physics? naw man, teacher told us it was casual friday, so i decided to be super casual and not go.
Question: why is there a dildo glued to my kitchen table?
I fell off the front porch last night. Actually.. I dove. I dove off the front porch.
just heard a tri-delta girl talking about her drunken escapades last weekend...it's like the exact plotline to a hardcore porno.
well my dad not being home definitely made it less awkward to walk in carrying the bra I left wearing.
Note to self not a good idea to try and make out with a girl when she's crying over her boyfriend
No way. Every time you have sex with him you'll end up staring into those eagle eyes and stop mid-orgasm.
its warm now so i can go back to sleeping with guys based on their fuckability rather than how much warmth they generate.
Yeah..I guess you know your hair looks like shit when TSA asks to inspect it
I'm 25 and I shit my bed last night. And I'm telling you about it. Not sure which is worse
You know you had a good night when you wake up cuddling a baseball bat and a can of chicken noodle soup.
The name of the man in your bed is not Ryan. I can't remember what his name is but that is wrong
I've had my dick out in public way too much for someone my age...
Great... now even my dreams are making fun of me
He's such a jerk. If only his penis was attached to someone else
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