Remember that sex scene from American Psycho?
Ya, why?
We should try that some time.
Ninja stars and alcohol are a bad combo
you were stealing lawn gnomes and punching cars. I'm not surprised you got arrested.
I don't want end up bound and gagged in the back of a van headed for rehab. Bound and gagged OK. Just not the rehab part.
Is there a technical name for reverse cowgirl? I'm trying to maintain a little dignity with my mother here
dude wearing that thong all day was not worth the 7 bucks
I'm studying for my midterm by watching porn with Spanish subtitles. Surprisingly the words are still really distracting..
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
She twisted her ankle and paid a homeless guy for a piggy back ride home from the bar.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
The alcohol just runs so smoothly thru my veins.
I'm drunk at 3:28
I'm jealous as shit at 3:34
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
I have just discovered the land of milk and honey. and by milk i mean vodka and by honey i mean tequila.
I am dancing alone in my bathroom because I was paranoid the neighbors were watching through the windows
Randomize
