That girl really should ne nicer to her vagina. It's not a playground.
Apparently hers is a theme park.
She just got back from rehab. You dont celebrate that with margaritas.
she said "feliz nobby job" then proceeded to give me a blowjob.
just took my temp. 103. i wonder how tylenol and jager bombs are gonna mix
I wish they had an "I'm Stoned" genre on online Netflix
man, work is way more interesting with these acid flashbacks.
Dude. The walls are totally staring at me right now. I told you this was a bad idea.
Going stoned out of mind to my sociology exam because it's really just a pizza party. I love community college.
I vaguely remember chanting "USA" at the pool when we were talking to the Frenchies.
We were pointing at fat people and chanting USA.
I tried to bribe him with road head and his toothbrush.
Hey, I think I showed you a picture of my nephew while we were fucking last night. Sorry, I know it's weird, I just really love that kid. Again, sorry.
All of my Tinder matches have neck tattoos. It's like God wants me to go to jail again.
she walked through the crowd, completely naked, slapped a pool attendant in the face and stole the towel he was carrying. she used it to dry her hair.
i just had to ask the gas station attendant what state i was in... winning at life.
im in missouri by the way.
A reminder in my phone just went off saying, "Fuck.On.Roof- the Great Bambino". This makes me excited and slightly nervous.
Randomize
