I’m once again drinking at eight am on a Sunday in my tutu. This garment is literally my best purchase ever.
It was then that he suggested we all nibble ears. A nibble circle.
He invited me to see "alison wonderland" WHAT THE FUCK THATS NOT A FIRST NAME/LAST NAME TYPE DEAL
Take your time, they're doing body shots off the dog.
I think this baby is eyeing my beer
i feel like i was in a swimming pool of captain and coke and had to drink my way out
I just creeped on air mattress guy's facebook and discovered his ex is the trifecta of evil: tiny, cute, and blonde.
He's rescued me passed out naked on the playground next door and I've rescued him passed out naked in the middle of campus. That's why we're a great couple.
Any chance I can buy my dignity back with $45?
you walked around drinking beer out of a plunger and telling people it was a goblet...
Said he wanted to wear me as a loincloth. Not sure if sexual or predatory
I havent moved from the couch and I'm licking peanut butter from a spoon, I'm a beautiful person.
I got all the way to work before I realized there were Trojans in my bra.
Why the fuck is Ian Naked eating string cheese in my guest bedroom?
4 of us. Guys and girls. Were sitting there discussing the passed out half naked Brit girl on the floor. She is no longer the international woman of mystery.
Randomize
