id be glad to
What wine goes with Cap'n Crunch?
i just sent this text using only my big toe
You would only drink if the space jam soundtrack was playing, you thought it was hilarious that before every shot you said "y'all ready for this".
I just found out that the liquid capacity of my breasts is 700ml each. I should not be left alone at home when drunk.
she's like the billy mays of hookups...touch my boobs and i'll throw in this blow job ABSOLUTELY FREE
this speak and spell drinking game will be the death of us all.
I apparently insisted on hugging all the bushes and apologizing for pollution on the way home.
I don't think ill be here long the chick I came to see is blowing rails with a drag queen
I vote for a trading skills night. You teach me to juggle, I'll teach you knife fighting, and we'll both learn banjo
multiple people will be seeing my nips tonight. not mad about it at all
this makes me concerned. not enough to actually do anything about it, but yeah.
I feel like the dump I just dropped is the most successful thing I've done so far today.
I think the cats may be lesbians. It could just be a two hour mutual bath but it sure looks like a 69.
ARE YOU FUCKING KIDDING ME! I SAID I WANTED SOMEONE CLASSY AND INSTEAD YOU SET ME UP WITH A GUY THAT JUST TOLD ME HIS FAVORITE PLACE TO FUCK IS ON HIS SWAMPBOAT “THE SLAMHOG!”
I DON’T WANT TO FUCK IN A SWAMP
First of all, his AIR boat is named “Slam Hog” not “The Slamhog.” Second, it’s top of the line. Third, don’t dismiss swamp sex before you try it!
Randomize
