ad ew i am wasted whats my problem
By the way the awkward moment from yesterday is now a bad situation I have to figure out.
Thank you Grey Goose.
He is in the front yard trying to catch birds out of the air with a fishing net.
Idk if you remember me telling you about him, but I gave him a hj under the stars. Kind of added a little disney aspect to the whole experience.
its official: beach shits are the exact same as mountain shits
I have full custody of my vagina however you are granted visiting hours
Holy shit, Uber is testing a service to summon an ice cream truck.
Bring me the penis of the founder so I may endlessly fellate him. Or cunnalinge. I don't discriminate.
The maid moved your bed and found almost 40 used condoms and wrappers. She just looks at me and says "Dave?"
IT ISN'T. I'M A LITTLE HIGH.
YOU'RE ALWAYS A LITTLE HIGH.
NO. IT'S RARE THAT I'M A LITTLE HIGH. I'M ALWAYS HIGH AS FUCK. THERE'S A DIFFERENCE.
.It's like gods test of willpower against vaginal comfort
I am harder than a fucking diamond and Michael Bolton is playing. Your move.
Go have sex with him right now! Drunk sex is the best sex.
I know but these gold fish are so much better
i smell like vinegar and tequila i can feel the old people behind me judging
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
Randomize
