yea ive hooked up with like half those guys
and i've hooked up with the other half...when our powers combine, we are captain slutbag
I didn't want to talk to him so I just started telling him how important Jesus was to me
i love how he claims to not know english but when i ask him to come over and fuck me he's all of a sudden fluent
get over here now. the boys are doing shots of everclear, chasing with monster, and some dude jsut walked in with a backpack full of tattoo gear.
The bartender from Thursday remembered me... And gave me a FLAMING BUCKET of alcohol.
Day #3 of being the only sober person at the bar. This is depression.
Preparing for the bar exam has made my whatever disorder you said I have act up again
40s are totally the cure
Is 28 too old to get fingered in Centennial Park? Asking for a friend.
I appreciate the I'll come bail you out of jail tone in the text
There needs to be a greeting card for "I miss having sex and smoking weed with you."
I think I might start referring to your vagina as a separate being now
Do the security cameras outside your house capture sound? If so your whole family is going to hear me describe my threesome
well...I was at work...until someone dropped dead during their performance of "I believe I can fly". It was karaoke night.
His dick smelled like strawberries...it was awesome.
Randomize
