Jesus was obviously not given an itemized list of your sins before he died for them
Puking blue powerade in mcdonalds parking lot to the applause of the guy taking out the trash with man in the mirror blasting in the background. Good morning stl
when I woke up the last searched thing on my phone was "how to make a fireproof dress" I need to stop drinking.
the people next to us in line are buying a 12 pack and a snuggie
I JUST WANT SOMEBODY TO EXPLAIN HOW FORESKIN WORKS AND DO NOT UNDERSTAND WHY THIS IS A PROBLEM.
She narrowed it down to 7 guys that could have gotten her pregnant.
Things we need. Powerade. Water in fridge. Mixers for vodka. And reality checks.
Buying Plan B right after a lecture on feminism. It's nice to know who I can thank for that right.
He is now tagging himself in my pics from last year where he is barely visable in the corner. i feel like he's marking his territory.
Is it bad of me to apply as a night shift counselor at a boys orphanage purely because of how laid that would get me at bars?
I will pre answer that I did not see it the fun way. He was peeing outside.
Wanna get mid day margaritas tomorrow if I'm still alive
I'm pretty sure that's why we have such good sex because we are secretly trying to kill each other
I just stood beside an Amish man and bought Cocoa Krispies and tampons.
Is it sad to eat a candy bra by yourself?
Randomize
