it seems that i get a boner from just about everything now
Does my surprise involve the use of a safe word?
Probably.
I'm in.
i'm saving my butt for my wedding night
So Ive decided I have serious issues. Im walking around the school with a bag labeled booze money collecting from people while slightly hungover at 8:20 in the morning, and nobody is questioning me.
did i by any chance text you anything about feathers last night?
you mean faeutihaers?
were drug buddies, doing lines off her ass is just a bonus
He was having an allergic reaction to that new brand of vodka Eric brought, so he just started chasing with benadryl.. Talk about commitment.
Is YOLO really just a socially acceptable way to say you enjoy putting things up your nose?
I've smoked enough weed to put down a pony.
That sad moment when even your drug dealer lands a summer internship and you don't...
He always finds the good stuff. He's like a truffle pig for bud.
yea talk to her if you feel up to it. Just remember who you are
Oh shit sorry I just gave lion king advice sorry not mufasa
I'm not trying to take your husband away from you, but can we have another 3way soon? I'm just desperate for good dick.
I explained to him that me turning straight is a once a year thing. And this boy just happens to be the chosen one.
The bride is so wasted, she fell into her cake.I wanna be on her level
Randomize
