Tell him ill love him long time
I'll assure him of it
Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
She was so drunk yelling at me in my driveway to fuck her. It was the ghetto version of Romeo and Juliet.
Wore last nights jeans to Christmas Dinner with the fam, found a half gram of blow, while they're praying ill be railing.
Pretty sure I'm taking the break up well. Alcohol made me okay with it and drugs keep me agreeing with why I dumped him in the first place.
Bring a bathing suit for the glitter slip n slide
He paid me $20 to swallow a baggie of glitter, which turned out to be the best decision I've ever made. My vomit has never been prettier.
You were, but he disappeared after you said you wanted him to get you pregnant so you'd have a child by the time the Boy Meets World sequel starts
He got naked and made a run for the door so I had to stop him.
he doesn't sweat normal. maybe that's what THC smells like coming through the sweat glands...
Moral of the story: always keep condoms in your bra
Got with someone dressed up as Allen from the hangover so that's where I'm at in life
you ran up to the police and said "fuck the police shit we living in hell ". Then you dropped your Margarita and said "Darby Out" lol
They are going to name an STD after you.
The contents of my fridge consist of alcohol, Nuva ring, and cheesecake. I'm that girl.
Randomize
