Why. Ill be the rabbit if ull be the carrot.
I told you I would drunk text you sometime........its that time.
Just tipped at a bar in cheerios. Suck it.
If she's telling you consent laws theres probably a reason
THE MIME IS MIMING TO BUST A MOVE KARAOKE. ALL MIME-RELATED EVENTS DESERVE CAPS LOCK
It's like getting ready for my vaginas own execution
The silhouette of his dick looked like an eagle. Amurrican.
Which outfit says "I'm sorry for your loss but we're still banging later"?
We were so hungover we fell asleep in Goodyear waiting for them to fix her car. At 4 in the afternoon on a Sunday. The workers apparently didnt want to vacuum because they didn't want to wake us.
In case you're wondering what eggs stolen from an elementary school's chicken coop taste like, delicious. Delicious is what they taste like.
she paid $15 and a box of cheerios for their acid
Well my summer has already been productive. I partially caused a divorce.
I just bought sparkling water with plan B. I am the most basic bitch to ever exist.
What can I say, like your penis. The fact that I like the person attached to it helps too
we started drinking at 4pm, somehows its 1 am im in bathing suit running from the cops.....any explanation of what happened?
Randomize
