I haven't seen him in over a year. He asked me to his prom over myspace. Is he fucking serious?
tweet Hawks Win!! tweet
That's how twitter works, right?
how did you get vomit on both your shoulders. I mean think about it.
i crunched every chip from the dorito bag and poured it in the vase. never again will i have to deal with cool ranch fingers.
Thank GOD those kids were having a lemonade stand, I didn't have anything to wash down my plan b with.
I don't think i can handle my uncle say again that kid rock is a true musician....
Ever find yourself wondering if your life is God's way of telling a joke?
Just came during my obgyn appt. I need to get laid.
You know our reunion in two weeks shall be a drunken bikini clad magical adventure right
I have no idea. I think this is what happens when people take drugs in the middle of the day
HOW MANY BOYS NOT ONLY APPROVE OF YOUR PLAN TO BECOME POCAHONTAS, BUT WANT TO MAKE SURE YOU DO IT RIGHT? One, the answer is one, and he is the best and if anyone ever tries to steal him I can assure you they will never be heard from again
Omg my butt feels so much better. Those suppositories are magic. It feels like Jesus fingered me in my sleep.
it's pizza time hurry your sexcapades
She left you responsible for her guinea pig for what, 3 hours? And it somehow died under your care? I will no longer trust you with so much as a beer.
as a lesbian i'd like to thank joe biden and also america for giving us this absolute MILF for a VP
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