Only in Alabama do they play hymns in a bar!!!
she was mega hot - except for the poop under her fingernails
we got so high we spray painted his girlfriend's UGG boots. she's CRYING. it's hysterical.
She sang Bad Romance to me. Not really the answer I was looking for.
Sarah Palin is going to have a show on the discovery channel...Can I get a moment of silence for knowledge?
just went to my meeting with last nights make up still on, not wearing a bra, and the 14 shot tallies still on my wrist.. My advisor's questions should be answered as to why I'm not in my major yet.
I don't know what happened to get you in this mentality. This time last year your were ass up on a hotel bathroom counter getting licked by a stranger.
You had a towel around you and you called it your shot bib.
I just saw a group of 50+ year old women all wearing shirts that said "drink up, bitches" ...please tell me that can be us some day.
If you spent as much time trying to get laid as you do masturbating you would surpass all of us.
I seriously told a stripper I would hold her hand when she goes to get ass implants.
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
I think we might have a drinking problem when the ASU kids called us crazy
No one made them take a shot with us at the 12 hour mark. That's their bad
i pushed adam in a shopping cart for 15 blocks, then we realized we left tyler downtown
did you go back and get him?
nah we went to a karaoke bar instead, so worth it
I woke up with a pube in my teeth...I'm disturbed cause we're both clean shaven
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