He had some BAD nuttage
Nuttage?
It's like cleavage......... but different
Wish I didn't live with 3 girls so I could beat off in peace.
You told him how lucky he was to be an elephant and kept trying to grab his "trunk"
My goal of the day is to not shit myself. That's it. Setting the bar real low
Important update! My next door neighbours have a canoe. Repeat: THEY HAVE A CANOE! We are having sex in it before this summer is over.
Plus, it's just valuable. Virgin pee is very well-priced.
Remember that time I sent you a 5lb bag of gummie bears?
Like it was yesterday.
Apparently I had it on auto deliver. So whoever is at your apt is gonna gen an interesting delivery...
if this uncomfortable exchange we're having is you trying to flirt with me i suggest you stop it before someone gets hurt
A baby just tried to pull out his mom's huge tits at work today and nearly succeeded. I was silently cheering for the little guy.
I only have one kid whom I wish to hit in the face with an active jackhammer. How's work?
she's a drunken disney princess. so basically me if i had a crown and no desire for independence.
That's really the only reason I'm dating you, the prospect that I might get bacon
I like to send nudes ok? If that's my biggest flaw I think I'm ok
Danny put 5 hr energy in the jungle juice (that brilliant bastard) and I almost showed my penis to Alex. It was a rough night.
We just fucked in the park on a bench and a guy with a dog walked past us and the dog walked right up to us while the guy stared at his phone.
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