How you know a guy is gay: they say they would want money, not sexual favors, from emma watson
Never let Scott cook bacon and eggs at 2am while drunk. You should have seen the flames.
so I finished the entire bottle...next thing I know, it's 8 am and I wake up on the fucking beach in the low tide with a family standing about 30 feet from me just staring.
Legit screaming match in this bar over the differences between cupcakes and muffins.
You were dancing around the clubbing yelling "best wingman ever" and raising your cast in the air
Update: it wasn't just our driver. This ticket confirms that the Royal Oak PD also found our behavior on the party bus to be "Lewd and Indecent."
Ive seen him cuddling a giant inflatable seahorse. Nothing could be creepier than that.
Yep. It's going to be us, strippers, and drag queens.
A glittery, gay, heavily makeuped, scantily dressed clusterfuck.
WE SHOULD FUCK TWO GUYS THAT LIVE TOGETHER
THAT WOULD BE SO CONVENIENT WE COULD CARPOOL
Dude, I came home and you were passed out halfway through the front door in your Minnie Mouse outfit... with a beer still in hand
Waking up next to a guy you don't remember going home with and the first thing you say is: where is my tiara? = successful birthday
Note to self: never fuck a Canadian, surprisingly highly disappointing
WHY CANT I FIND JUST A NORMAL DISNEY LOVING MAN TO PAINT WITH ALL THE COLORS OF THE WIND WITH!!
So being hungover in an office full of people with hangovers for 9 hours is quite possibly what hell will be like.
I lysoled the money\n(631): wrong text lmao
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