Totally smoking with fifteen year olds.
Sex on a kitchen table is not as amazing as they make is seem in the movies.
She is totally STD
Is it a bad omen that my phone auto corrects dtf to STD
his internet history is a lot of porn, how to make a hovercraft and side-effects of jacking off too much
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
he swears he got herpes from a bowl of soup
WHY are the edges of my bra charred???
I gave up my innocence when I let him cum in my spelling bee trophy
Thats the worst face I've ever seen you make an I've seen you throw up in your own hair.
She came to the party dressed as slutty elmo and then called me oscar the grouch for not wanting to bang her in the dumpster outside.
she is way to in-touch with her childhood
OH MY GOD I CAN'T WAIT TO BONE YOUR EX BOYFRIEND. HOW AWKWARD IS THIS?
At one point I was waiting in line for the port o potties and a storm trooper came out of one and sprayed me in the face with a water gun
Like that actually happened I wasn't hallucinating
Not even joking, someone broke into the house to watch porn. The cops are on the way.
That feeling when you're ready to convert to the religion of whatever god will stop the vomit. Dynamite is illegal.
He wanted to take me to breakfast in the morning. He told me he respects me after I said no. I told him to respect me at a distance.
Randomize
