So why didn't Edward and the Cullens just kill Hitler?
You need to stop watching Twilight.
Girls gone wild is like the hills, except sexy and it doesnt suck
If it makes you feel any better I'm plucking my mustahce and drinking. Alone.
they started a semi-successful rumor that toby keith died. who says fraternities don't have goals
at least you got your priorties in line. new years first, than the baby.
Idk wtf I would do on a date. I thought wed passed that stage at least for a while. Nowadays dates should consist of blackouts and shameful mistakes.
My goal tonight is to get arrested because what cop can say they have ever arrested a giant sperm before. God I love halloween
By the third Id pass back i figured the bouncer had fucked one of us.
Love is....waiting for your girl to throw up her shot in the bathroom...then handing her her beer. Game face.
i woke up and found a picture of his grandma in my purse.. im a kelpto
I just spent an hour in the shower pretending I was a member of the b-52's. I can't go to work like this
Don't stress. That was a joke. I'd trust my pets with no one else. Accidents happen. Sometimes things go smoothly when you help a neighbor out and sometimes you electrocute their fish. Life is funny that way.
Like wanna sit on your face while you speak German hot
Goat in kitchen.....explanation?....
Car sex in a public place. Boo ya.
Randomize
