In line at the arbys drive thru on foot. Legendary.
Why is my head in the toilet this morning but there is vomit behind the toilet
I think dad's getting high again. His last google search was "awesome ping pong shit."
even if everyone didnt know them screaming eskimo brothers and high fiveing over my head kinda gave it away
I sat in the mc D drive thru and refused to move till the chick gave me her number
we are cloud gazing and there is one that looks like a giant baby riding a dolphin and smoking a joint
i wish there was a reasonable explanation for why this reminds me of you
I spit up blood this morning
That's vegas.
of all the people in our graduating class, this is exactly who would get pregnant.
I vaguely remember you trying to make me a casserole with marshmallows and a can of beer.
i know. like I have the nerve to talk about poverty. I eat peanut butter out of the jar.
I'm not sure New Orleans is real. Even the grocery stores sell vodka.
I'm sure as hell not getting hoodwinked into going back to rehab again
He radiates elegant sexual dominance. I bet even his balls have pinstripes.
I left him naked in his bed. I did cover his junk with a blanket in case his roommate walked in later though. so I don't feel as bad about it.
sorry for the late response. was in jail for 6 months.
Randomize
