so i just saw your dad embarking upon a biking journey in full reflective gear
...this stays between you and me
i'm so high i feel like the people i'm chatting with online can some how see that i'm naked.
babies were throwing up all over the place
I was watching truelife I'm transgendered. This tranny already got a date a week after getting a vagina. I've had a vagina my entire life and can't get a date.
wanna hang out tonight and remember it?
Just made a coke joke and literally drooled on myself. How do we feel about pavlov's theory of conditioning now?
told weddin planner we wanted to work in ceremonial body shots before vows. she hasnt reponded yet...
Well apparently I'm no fun since I won't have a threesome with him and my mother.
I didn't think about how painful the pumpkin seeds coming up the next morning would be. Oh well, I'm good at making pumpkin seeds and that's all that matters.
I came in your room, you looked at me and said "I fucked up" and then some kid showed up and took you to the hospital
So right before she was about to give me head she tapped the tip and said "Is this thing on" I think I'm in love.
We were having sex in the gardens when the grounds keeper walked up on us. He gave me a thumbs up and walked away
Ok, now help me add to my topless picture collection, i'm going to make myself a calendar
I think he bit my vagina. Who does that?
I just had 3 numbers I don't know text me and remind me I am to attend AA on monday. Im gonna say it was a good night.
Randomize
