I am so gay it hurts my loins. Going to see She's Just Not That Into You... again. Ohhh my goodness.
How is Miami?
Omk. I'm shitggaved om loincoln
So my graduate coordinator is possible gay man. I may have just found the easiest way to a degree ever.
Good plan b, put your number on all your forms. Hello gamefull employment.
Take that integrity
I would invite you but we are high and there is an AK-47. Not your scene.
yeah come on over we're just pre gaming for the grocery store
let's remember the whole point of NYE: to drink antisocial amounts of antisocial drinks, become incoherent, ruin a carpet, talk to a tree, wake up with head sellotaped to toilet. The where/how is superfluous, my vote goes to a cupboard and a bottle of jaeger Questions?
From now on I forbid you to refer to it as a "bed". From now on you must only use the phrase "sex wagon".
My office already closed tomorrow. I'm bout to get drunk and build a muh fuckin fort. I shall call it "Fort Fuck You, Sandy, You Fuckin Bitch"
You had two tasks: \n1) put on a condom \n2) text me so I don't walk in on you \nIt really isn't that hard
I just want to like rub my face on his abs
I need help
Also I played a weird game of chicken in the ladies room at work between myself the person pooping 2 stalls over and a very determined maintenance man.
I don't know his last name, but he's in phone as Pat the conqueror.
I'm just saying; the box truck will cost less then dorms or rent, and we can always crash where the party is.
we need to find a way to be drinking champagne 24/7
Sorry. We had to leave because I knocked a guy out for saying "yolo".
Randomize
