And her vagina tasted EXACTLY like a slim jim
I'm so high, I forgot to harvest my farmville crops....noooooooo.
Worst stoner tragedy.
The ratio was 19 to 1 and the 1 was lauren so it didn't even count.
btw found the cat. he didn't appreciate the toilet bath.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
Honestly, I've had enough of his asshole to last me the new year.
Please tell me you're talking about his personality.
You couldn't remember her number so you tried to dial her name into your phone. Once you realized you didn't know her name, you dialed 7 random numbers
So we broke my sobriety. Played life size childhood games. Broke into a cold hot tub and got laid. I think this is BFF quality!
The internet is out at West Chester so I'm masturbating using my imagination. What is this, the fucking dark ages?
But now he's gone and I'm exhausted and my vagina is yelling at me and I want a cheeseburger
My walk of shame was four miles long and I had to stop for a water break. I am the picture of class.
He could only go twice. I need a guy with more stamina and is less married
Just so you know. And I'm telling you this because I care deeply for you. Blue raspberry poptarts taste exactly the same as the regular raspberry ones.
All I'm saying is this is the exact reason I should not be left unsupervised.
I went home with him again and he LEFT HIS OWN HOUSE at 2 in the morning while I was IN THE BATHROOM.
Randomize
