How can i ever say i miss u when u wont go away
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
I caved and texted him. But it's strictly drug dealing business so it doesn't count.
The remote chance that I may get a blowjob is about the only reason I have a shower every day.
Just got a birthday card from Camel. How am I supposed to stop smoking when they care?
I'm doing it for my vagina. You should understand that
Things I woke up with this morning: half a mcmuffin, orange hair, one shoe and a friendly german man. Tequila was a brilliant idea.
My roommate says its rare that you can be tear gassed before you lose your virginity so i feel accomplished in life
Ya I guess if we compared our actions now with our actions 2 years ago. We are definitely in a constant state of shit showness.
We were having sex and his high flatmates stood outside his room playing the guitar and singing Somebody to Love by Justin Beiber. Weirdest night ever.
this dude just showed up to the party with a falcon
Im officially canceling McCormick Monday. I got a raise.
Sooo grey goose Tuesday?????
I plan on showing these boobs to so many people that by the end of it ill just have a shirt of beads.
I'm going to make a stack of pancakes and fuck it. Right now.
Either I'm getting old or the shit show is playing earlier than it used to...
Randomize