Dude i dont know how people can complain that waterboarding is such a bad thing. I just sat through a fucking puddle of mudd show. Now thats torture
hahahahahahhahahahaha. 26, Dominican, has a funny accent, thinks I'm hot. Tots boning.
why wash my dick in the morning if you're not there to suck it?
Dude I'm telling you, conditioner is the best for jerking it in the shower. It feels great and afterwards everything is all smooth
oral is when you put your mouth on someones privates and play moterboat or popsicle
just mention it in a side comment sometime today... like oh by the way i have a daughter but um yeah my day was good
Don't talk about his dick. That's mine. There's a copyright on it. Use with permission
My neck kind of hurts. I think from sleeping on the concrete.
so when our kids ask "when did you know you loved mommy?" you're gonna say "when she sent me emoticons about slobbing on my knob?"
And noooow we're smoking a ton of REALLY strong weed and THIS IS THE SOFTEST CAT EVER
I'm gonna give the church their tithe, and the rest is a down payment on boobs.
just saw two eagle scouts making out in chic-fil-a
We need a signal or code word for "I basically shaved my whole body and we should touch each other tonight".
shit... I double booked my fuck buddies
It's official! Naked girl is back and making stir fry. Still not sure she realizes we can see her whole apartment from our balcony. Cheap beer and a show.
Randomize
