I only want to know people that are dynamic intelligent and totally insane
Incredible sex, Maddow, more sex, spoon, sex again
I just found out my boyfriend is cheating on me, please tell me Carl is a unisex name.
The stripper had a daughter my age and offered to introduce us. I didn't know what to say to that.
#1 lesson to be learned from mardi gras this year: lock your car doors or some grimy dude like me might just bang in it and use your backseat as a kleenex
Whenever you feel bad about your life, just remember the time I tried to swim while high and thought for a minute I was genuinely drowning
I dunno. The only plans I have for sure after finals are smoking a bowl and eating a 5 pound gummy bear. btw I bought a 5 pound gummy bear
Not sure I just ate a really big pot brownie, I feel like my future is uncertain
I don’t know what's weirder; the fact that I weigh more with an erection..or the fact that I actually weighed myself with an erection...
Dad was on the deck drinking straight bourbon. He stopped, puked on his feet, and then continued drinking and talking about compound interest.
there's an entire drinking game devoted to nobody liking her face
White girls? They're everywhere. In packs. Drunk white girl packs.
I have a 8 minute video of a fish tank on my phone.
We need to stop going to pet stores high.
Oh god, I forgot we had sex to Elton John
i still cant feel my toes or walk straight...its been 2 days.
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