apparently i peed in my fridge last night because my vegetable drawer was filled with it.
when we were having sex and i started crying and telling you i missed you..why couldnt you stop and tell me how you felt or make me feel better?you kept going...
I won the karaoke contest at the bar last night, when they called my name i was doing blow off the toilet seat, i thought they caught me, i didnt even know there wasa contest
THERE ARE SO MANY GREAT DICKS IN THE WORLD. HOW DID I NOT DISCOVER THIS SOONER!?
He told me that if his bed could talk, it'd write a medical journal. Guess it's too late to worry about that now.
We officially wrote our house rules 1. We do not waste alcohol 2. Pinky promises mean something 3. Don't leave your facebook open, and if you do, don't complain 4. Never refuse cuddle or catch phrase
he told me while inside me and mid thrust that he's dreamed of that moment since high school... awkward
The smell came through my closed door. His farts are made of rendered tires, and apparently, ghosts.
I love you so must. You as do fraty. You are truly my veste breakable (ties I wtf racket Andover). Luce you. Have a safe drive bio dough failover.
If I get aids I am starting a lawsuit against snapchat.
Let me tell you how my drug dealer wants me to take his girlfriends little sister to jr prom
We met up and made out in front of an empanada spot, if that's not romance then idk what is.
i'm so glad to be in bed i'd like to thank the acadermy
I hate the cold months. Everybody starts hibernating and I start talking to guys I would never normally talk to. You have a drug habit and no license? Perfect candidate for a boyfriend...
I know right? It's like he knows how to pleasure me better than I do myself... He's like a prophet of sex
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