Call meee
Ok, but just to warn you, I'm as drunk as a Kennedy right now...
"Monday" is guna come over...
but its Thursday?
yeah, but she cant make it.Monday can...so there ya go
I thought spray tan was a myth
?
You know, something that only happens in Jersey
If you're on a tempurpedic mattress do you think you can feel if someone is jacking off right next to you?
If I pass out leave the food near me so i can wake up to it
he told me it was a naked video of him so i opened it. i just got rickrolled while sexting
I just took boredom to a whole new level. I just auto-tuned and remixed today's western civ lecture
please tell me you didn't have sex with him in the bathroom...
Does an alley count?
can we change the rule from "no one is ugly after 2 am" to 1130 so i can justify last night
She said I wasn't helping her abandonment issues by not responding to her texts at 4 am
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
His and hers buttplugs were a resounding success. Tru luv
Regardless I WANT TO BE YOUR SEX DISPENSARY. that is like the career I was born for.
He may not be good for my soul but he’s great for my vagina!
Randomize
