the red head has a bf
just because there's a goalie doesn't mean u can't score
that's the second time you've been mistaken as a prostitute. maybe life is trying to tell you something
its my fault though, i'm wearing tights
you're hiking in tights? you remind me of dennis quaid's fiance in the parent trap
I wonder why dictionaries dont have indexes to help find the words easier.
i'm getting the "you hooked up with my friends" speech from him. i'm returning with the "gotta keep my quota up" speech
I guess the study abroad went badly, I gave him a joint and he just smoked it and cried all the way from the airport
At one point I thought we were going to have to fuck our way out of their apartment
Haha he puts me in a mood mix of annoyed and... "just get in my pants"
I dealt with the imported moonshine, but when the cocaine came out, I had to get the fuck out of there
Well he was saying something about being emotionally unavailable since his dad died, but then I blew him in a tree and he shut up
nothing like having plan b for breakfast in a cvs parking lot before ordering this semester's textbooks
Dude my body has gone into shock from not eating frozen pizza and chips. I've been shitting like Richard Simmons after a night out of twerking in a corn field
This love triangle bullshit is getting out of hand. It's now a love polygon and I want out
Your life has no conflict it's just a blur of sex and Netflix
She was trying to be sexy well putting on my condom with her mouth when her cat pounced from the corner of the room witch caused her to gasp and inhale the condom
Alcohol and video games. A solid Friday night. Even before covid
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