OMg patrick swayze is the sexuest man he is killing me I'm gonna get dehydrated if I don't stop looking at him
The girl in the car behind me just took a bowl hit. I miss college.
they bought blue cups instead of red...wtf how am i supposed to pretend im on laguna beach??
I was arrested last night for attempting to flee and elude. I wasn't really trying to run from the police. I was drunk and lost in the woods. I thought it was pretty obvious when I was waving at them from my puddle of puke that I wasn't really hiding.
i woke up this morning next to my toilet covered in an attempt to make blanket of toilet paper
when it says do not use on the face or genital areas, it MEANS do not use on the face or genital areas.
That's cause you yelled across the parking lot you wanted to eat her out
No. I want to vom filet mignon and ziti bits everywhere and my body feels like I ran a cock triathalon. I feel less triumphant and more like death.
She just told me she thinks she bruised her labia in class
bought even stevens on dvd and enough weed and pizza bagels to last us a week.. ready to get snowed in?
I had to switch coats with someone at work because you can see the giant sex choke bruise on my neck. Being kinky is hard.
So yeah, my old kindergarten teacher just asked me who gave me the hickies on me neck.
I'm now using my vagina for good, not evil. Trying to restore balance to the force.
I WANT BLOOD. HERS. I WILL DYE A FABULOUS PAIR OF SUEDE PUMPS RED WITH HER BLOOD.
From now on I'd like to be known as Rampage.
Randomize
