he fingered me, smelled his fingers, then asked me what i ate today..
his penis is like a homeless cat. ever since I've satisfied him he keeps showing up on my doorstep ask for more.
After a valiant attempt at golf, I think it's time for Tiger to go back to doing what he does best- having sex w/ blond, white women.
and now that ive poetically compared your vagina to a nuclear missile, I hope youre prepared for this date.
coming out of a blackout being surrounded by Disney police was not as awesome as it sounds.
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Just heard one of my friends say, "if you're trying to take advantage of me I really dont care. I just want this beer." ..
On the bright side his mom approves of me. Though it's apparently because she sleeps with married men and has a soft spot for "fellow homewreckers"
You know I found it really difficult to find a full lenght picture for the egg donor site where I wasn't holding any alcohol...
Also, horsecock action starts in about a month. Have you prepared yourself yet?
Life goal: sit on his perfect beautiful David Archuleta-lookalike face
the only thing she has in her apt so far is toilet paper and shot glasses. you can see where the priorities lie.
I need a guy who can see in me what the lesbian community sees in me
My vagina is very pro this idea
you fell asleep with her panties on your face. how are you surprised??
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