is swine flu sexually transmttd?
Ha no, why?
sriously ive never had a hangovr this bad
I just saw a license plate that said "Guidete" at college. This proves the world is officially ending in 2012
I hate when people I sell to add me on Facebook. I'm your dealer, not your friend, C'mon people.
Well he paid for dinner, so I paid for the Plan B, but the parking ticket I got is totally his responsibility.
He tried to make an olympic torch by lighting a corona box on top of a pool cleaner.
I'm so hungover I literally am considering drinking from the fishtank to avoid getting out of bed.
He hasn't left the hospital without a nurse's number all year. My nurses are always ugly or men. Wtf bro
Everyone at work loved my story about sobering up in a river with no bra on.
Nvm, he just almost drank his drink from last night, his drink that has the condom in it. Kinda answers my question.
But is that really the name you want to scream out during climax?
Started the 4th with a foursome. I don't know if it gets more festive than that. #MERICA
Maybe because you rubbed my clit while we were making churros
How ironic... opening your legs for closure.
You are telling me my dick tastes like a taco supreme?
I'm saying this "taco supreme" tastes like your dick.
I'm so hungry and so lazy that I'm seriously considering ripping into that packet of cream cheese in my nightstand.
Randomize
