i got really high and listened to the spongebob squarepants theme song and, i swear to god, it was in german.
The bar I'm at just passed out smores to everyone. I don't know what it has to do with cinco de mayo but I'm down.
Please fuck him. And then let me tell her. And then let me protect you from the knife she pulls from her Ed Hardy purse. Please.
It went from "haha, this will be funny" to "full blown anime porn fetish"
Seriously? Time stamp. 2:31 AM. And I am taking self potraits with a tree. Betty Ford anyone?
I think the imperative here is that I literally knocked down a sorority house with the force of my dick.
Wackin it to the USA womens soccer team. My own personal way of saying job well done.
Her hair goes down to her lower back and nobody was there to held it back for her. She looked like chewbacca dipped in vomit.
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
You won't wear your Santa suit, I can't get trashed, and you won't use handcuffs! This is the worst Christmas EVER.
I'm spending my Sunday wishing the entire Patriots offense would let me touch their manhood
I need to wash the frat house off of me
That awkward moment when the guy you were hitting on at the bar last night is a possible suspect in a murder case.
we thought it would be safer to lock you in the car alone downtown than take you back home to pass out
We live walking distance from the coors factory. no, we do not have a dry week.
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