chicago's viagra triangle is not unlike the bermuda triangle in thatt things just get lost...... planes, ships, dignity, virginity, etc.
No, drunk sperm still make babies.
Hannah Montana > iCarly
I'm disregarding that text and your testicles entirely
you walked into the kitchen holding the skyy bottle and asked us "how do i warm this?"
Apparently the library doesn't care about celebrating the day Jesus became a zombie.
I wouldn't accept the money so he folded the $20 bill into an origami puppy and left a note saying "Not blowjob money"
All I remember is taking a bath, puking in the bath water numerous times while trying to wash myself and I must of eventually given up
As shirtless as possible
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
4:37 am. You're wearing underwear and carpet skates. Borderline crying. You want to punch Morgan. Have not stopped singing Give Your Heart a Break.
I can't believe I'm giving you play by plays of this sexting convo. It's like a three way he doesn't know about.
I think I was just hit on by Jesus Christ. This is not okay. Bad Touch. I NEED AN ADULT!
Calm the hell down, it's just stoner Bob.
Just got up.... With the club stamp on my ass.... How did it got there????
According to the rule of quantum porn mechanics, the mere thought of something kinky causes it to exist. So out there, somewhere, there is already riddler/smurf porn...
BRB. These cougars are squabbling over my junk and one of them is offering to pay my tuition
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