I'm not saying he was bad at sex, but I'm pretty sure I anti-climaxed.
It was like the Ritz Carlton of jails. I got introduced to our criminal system the right way.
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
I don't know how many crown and cokes he went through but I know it was more that I have fingers. We are never leaving Texas.
I should probably just look up vagina pictures in the anatomy textbook. That always cheers me up.
I think you have the right to know, the water bottle you drank out of the other night is the bottle we use to catch what drips from the toilet. Love you!
I'm doing somethin that's never been done before...the 10 am booty call come over
OMG OMG OMG DID YOU KNOW THERE ARE MINI CHOCOLATE COWBOY HATS THAT MEN CAN BUY FOR THEIR PENISES?
I wish you were awake and high the same times I was awake and high. And also in the same state. So we can fuck passionately.
Now theyre filling the kiddie pool water with boxes and boxes of jello powder and im not sure if thats a sign i should leave or what
I can already tell, the amount of fun I'm having right now is not nearly going to compensate for the amount of "let us never speak of this again" I'm gonna have tomorrow
Someone the age of your son tried to go home with me from the bar last night
No feeling is better than coming home from your booty call and putting on a fresh pair of granny panties
I don't want his dick, I want his flame thrower!!
I have no regard for my liver, you should know this.
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