I think she gave up trying 2 land a bf and let herself go
You misogynist thinking that every girl wants a bf
They do. I don't appreciate u using big words idk and im gonna take offense
glad you had fun, i did too. am rubbing aloe on my butt now.
Got home from the bar at 4am. 100% sober, unlaid. Epic fail or responsible behavior?
Responsible fail?
it's circumsized.
I think this conversation is over.
Just found a keg and a mini-bike in our garage, this couldn't possibly go wrong
They kept trying to slap each other but they were poring beer onto their hands first referring to it as their baby powder
I just realized I'm trading you a pregnancy test for the morning after pill...
It's been a bad semester.
I'm sitting next to a ginger. She is decked out in olive green. Gingers fucking love olive green.
Sounds like sex on a twister board.
An idea that is both hilarious and intriguing...
I had him autograph the condom wrapper.
They told you that you couldn't fit in the dryer. Man, did they eat their words. You did brake the door though.
I just read "to infinity and beyond" as "to infidelity and beyond" something is seriously wrong with my psyche
YOU DRINK NOW BECAUSE YOU ARE A STRONG INDEPENDENT WOMAN WHO DOESN'T NEED A DRINKING PARTNER
Day two of not drinking, I think my cat is trying to eat me.
Psychosis secondary to sobriety???
I just fixed my mom's tv over the phone in 2.17 minutes while high. I'm a fucking professional.
Randomize
