Donna and I are betting on whether or not you are going to cheat on your boyfriend tonight....I said you wouldnt do it.
You might as well just give her the money now.
he just kept going up to random asian girls and yelling at them for breaking up the beatles
I am NOT getting arrested in a batman mask
Just an fyi, teatherball while wasted might be the hardest sport ever.
Somewhere between catching the stove on fire and not being aware of it being on fire while I'm in the living room. I drank too much.
congratulations to me i think I am on the road to legitimate alcoholism
cool. same. I'm in class drinking
NOT OKAY
sorry for partying
THATS NOT PARTYING THATS DRINKING IN CLASS
Listen I know you hate her for what she did but this is getting our of hand. Please please tell me where you hid her wedding dress.
My vagina is trying to run away to Boston without me.
He's so hot and there's so much R Kelly and vodka I think I might die.
Guys always stop talking to me right around the point that if they bought me food a couple times I would probably have sex with them.
You were a cyclone of alcohol and bad decisions - like a gay Tazmanian devil
Hey did you take a shower last night at like 4am?
"ummm...." (Thinking in my head) wet towel, soaking wet hair, clean pjs on backwards... "that would make more sense then what I thought happened..."
still drunk on my way to class to give my presentation on the negative affects of alcohol on the body. hell yes.
You can't say that. Only if you have peed on the side of the highway in daylight while signing Christmas songs can you say that.
The last thing I remember was them slipping shots into my beer bong, and me being happy about it
Randomize
