He keeps asking where i got my clothes and accessories. i'm not sure if he wants to fuck me, or go shopping.
And i generally try not to roofie people when I'm in a committed relationship.
So it turns out there are pros and cons to having a broken wrist. Pro: I can give amazing blowjobs with my left hand. Con: I just had to open a packet of crisps with scissors.
If i pass out for a while at graduation, please atleast TRY to wake me?
we're going to drop off one of our cars at the police station tonight so we'll be able to drive home in the morning
You need to get over here. I think the drunks are about to sacrifice a chicken to the beer gods. Or a freshman. Stay tuned.
Exotic beer tasting at my apt right now and by that I mean I bought random beer and I'm drinking it on my balcony
I just called the on campus pharmacy and asked the pharmacist to tell me how each one of my medications will react with "excess alcohol consumption". And I'm not even ashamed...I've reached a new low.
Someone came in the potted fern
GET ME OUT OF HERE THE DOCTOR KNOWS HE IS JUDGING ME I DEMAND A PRISON BREAK
MIDGETS
????
I think one make out session at a bar per year is probably the best choice.
All I remember is talking the cops into calling us a cab instead of giving us PIs while trying to wake up your passed-out-on-a-bench ass.
Found out that I went to the same elementary school as the guy I'm hooking up with. Kosher or no
I'm about to go get lunchables and alcohol. Take that adulthood
Randomize
