so are u like ashamed lol?
not really. i dont look at it as being homeless. im just going to pretend im on an extended camping trip
Yea well when i pee it makes steam.
I love that she's always that person who people think it's a good idea to invite her to something. and then she's there and you realize, "nope."
He called me "the Joe Montana of blowies." Not sure if that is an accomplishment or an insult, but going off of the amount of condensation on the windows of my car, I'm gonna just do a little touchdown dance and pass out.
The more I hate his personality, the more I love his penis.
Hes screaming about Slender man. whatever hes on is probably not healthy.
hahaha lucky. I'm fishing with some dude I just met when I woke up next to the mohawk river
Come get her ASAP. She's "people bowling," which is just her rolling into random groups of people. People look pissed.
It was a karaoke bar combined with a liquor store and had a donkey pen in the back.
Keeping it classy as usual I see
You can't text people with drinkers' regret at 8 in the morning. It's just bad form.
He gave me a beer, petted my head, and called me kiddo.
Where are you? We're in between the guy dressed as a giant inflatable penis and the Justin Bieber lookalike lesbians
Does the penis have a genital wart?
Come over. But instead of sex, will you rub anti itch cream all over my face?
He once bought a dildo and put fifty dollars and a happy anniversary note in the battery compartment I gotta lock him down while hes available
Your penis is the destroyer of worlds.
Randomize