You up for the gym tonight after work?
I'm up for a light workout and a nice yog.
Fair enough, I'm gonna hit it hard today.
Chris Brown style, or less felonious?
Haha, all felonious.
$1.99 mimosas n bloodys til 3. Happy hour starts at 4. We're gonna ride the mechanical bull to kill the hour inbetween.
Please take video.
i don't think it's normal to still be missing spring break.
all i remember is screaming butter knifes are for pussies.
This is a test of Andrews drunk texting, had this been an actual drunk text, all the words would be spelled incorrectly and would be missing key verbs and nouns, followed by a request to not get fired.
I was just stopped at a stop sign waiting for the moon to turn green.
You decided that walking wasn't in the cards for you anymore
I caught myself flirting with clients today. Someone needs to take me to pound town before I self destruct. This is a code red. I repeat code red.
He started to lick a stick of butter and was calling it Jennifer.
I really love you gals. I'm sorry again. I'm just super protective of my poutine
I went to BBQ fest on Wednesday and came home wearing a different shirt, so I think I did some good damage.
I'm having shoppers remorse over a dildo
You peed on a flamingo?!?
Sorry I’m late. Got horny watching the traffic report and had to rub one out
I wish I got tanner on friday but I feel like I spent most of my time puking in the bathroom. I love my life
Randomize
