so that guy from last night texted me saying i flashed half of my extended family last night. so classy.
Can I have the boy from 16 and pregnant's next baby???
I only have two playlists on my iPod. One for when im getting drunk, one for when I'm getting high. Is this something to be worried about?
12 garbage cans filled with water, a beer can floating in every garbage can, 20 ft. apart and you shoot with dodge balls..and thats only how the night began
bro, sorry for: trying to put you on fire yesterday, telling the bouncer that it was you that broke the bottles, and to have slept with your sister.
Did you fuck him in my garden last night?
That WOULD explain the dirt in my vagina
I taught her to play Monopoly. She sold me her bra to keep from going bankrupt.
He won't have sex to beyonce. I hate him.
Well I can't be held accountable to know every which time you slid a finger here or slid a finger there. I'm way too busy getting close to climaxing to document these things.
I could not handle jail. And my very angry parents.
He had Homeward Bound on VHS how was I supposed to not fuck him
Fuck it, I'm going to make my own dick pic album since iOS 10 won't do it for me.
If my dildo had feelings, they. Would've deffinately been hurt. He put that toy to shame..
Let's not forget that we had sex on the ground in public tonight.
Highlight of the day: got a bunch of drunks to sing baby shark.
Randomize
