we watched a tutorial on how to do guidette makeup
Apparently I kept telling the bartender that I was going to set the Guinness World Record.
Fuck Spring. The birds chirping at 4am make me feel unnatural for still being up and drunk.
the party was called freshmen disorientation. i was just following the theme
We decided to have a girls night of four lokos, three of us cried and the other puked
Babe when I told you that you needed to grow up I didn't mean get drunk and sponsor 8 African kids.
Yes. I feel like complaining about sex all the time with a 21 year old might be punishable by death of the sex gods so I try not to
I'n not even sure we went out, but I know we broke into a cemetery.
Apparently I was having great conversation with this 48 year old on grindr & he was concerned as to how I was getting home.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
This is gonna be the kind of weekend where if it involves putting on pants, it ain't happening.
I feel like a grown up and it scares me so I'm hiding out in the bathroom stall and messaging you
Oh my god.. Saw a commercial for Captain Morgan. Made me gag a little bit.
was i wearing any clothes at that point?
socks and a thong
He said when the pizza came I zip locked one slice and went to the couch and snuggled with it. Does that give you an idea of how my night was?
Randomize