She thinks she is all that and a bag of skittles but I'm definitely not tasting the rainbow...
I'm drinking in the hospital parking lot.
you were going around the whole club telling people to smell ur purse
Interestingly im still mad at you for the time we got high and you tried to hump me.
Lol thats a classic
she used her one phone call to ask me about my day
We can't bring brittanys dog so we are getting high and getting in my bathtub I think it's pretty safe
We finally have the house to ourselves and your out playing Lance Fucking Armstrong
I'm high and I have a consensual booty call on the way and just thought that it was a good time to let you know that I think that you are a stellar person.
I woke up on his couch and my bra was flung across the floor and filled with animal crackers
oh the usual. high as balls and crying about the hunger games.
I'm gonna look back at these days one day and be like "damn I shoulda been turnt but I was in bed instead watching netflix"
Um, when I went down on you it got stuck there. Still had gum in my mouth. Didn't exactly have use of my hands to assist
just woke up with nickles taped to my body. theres like a dollar worth.
i love how you, my friend, sends me a picture of herself wearing a shirt that says "i am dead inside" and i'm just like "awww baby you're so cute"
that's just solidarity
Remember when I was real fucked up and said I would give up utensils and only use chopsticks for lent?...just got the reminder on my phone.
Randomize
