if i died would you start the facebook group?
He said his penis was a 1 woman penis with a conscience an I was that woman...technically a declaration of commitment rite?
Walk of Shame'd halfway down a mountain, skiiers passing. Do not drink with lifties at the end of ski season.
Well I pulled a muscle in my leg dancing in the tanning booth drunk at 1 pm soooo there's that
I have effectively turned laundry day into a drinking game.
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
did you know that my friend knows a guy with 3 balls what the actual fuck
There's a mechanical bull in the basement dude where are you
To this day, I regret not having sex in the bathroom
What am I doing? I'm usually only attracted to horrible people.
What a way to start the day. Staring at penis for 3 hours
It's pretty much my favorite thing ever
woke up this morning and she was gone. but she left a box of donuts on the counter with a note saying "for all the 'o's you gave me last night"
I was literally so lonely last night that I stopped watching a video on porn hub and just read the comments
I just learned that I could drop out of school and spend the rest of my savings on a giraffe are you free this weekend
Is constant horniness a medical condition? Because a husband, a boyfriend and an office side piece should be enough penis for one girl - but they’re not :-(
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