My mom came into my room and told me to flip off the tv. I gave it the middle finger. Note to self: STOP SMOKING THIS SHIT
i dont know why he would complain when i touch him there.
I woke up with ten beers in my bag that hoarded at the party last night. Rally? Its five somewhere.
No need to talk. Eventually, he'll either stop coming over, or decide that it's a relationship.
And if not?
...I keep getting free bourbon and great sex with no expectations. You really don't understand that there is no "down side," do you?
It's been two days. I am still burping up jello. Everything tastes like jello. Everything smells like jello. I am DONE with jello shots.
It's always a good night until the penis tattoo makes an appearance
It's a sad day when you can't take off your pants and drink a margarita at work.
Her rack rivals that of the deer I shot last season. You need to get after that.
I sign my lease Thursday, I'm about to be released back into the wild.
I'll make missing person signs.
You're a good friend.
It's only just- an eye for an eye, a tooth for a tooth, a nude for a nude
I have hobbies that aren't destroying myself and others...i can make hats.....
can we drink soon
I'm not sure who this is but I'm free tomorrow night
I haven't gotten this high alone in a long time. I keep looking at the cat waiting for her to say something.
All I'm saying is Europe has not been easy on my vagina.
I'm at the gym. I've taken enough caffeine to feel inspired to be a low budget instagram fitness model. I totally forgot my push up bra though
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