i'm going to rape that little man
omg not your brother
What is the pluralization of human? I just got humen rejected, and I am going completely blank...
mom just texted me "hawaii ambien". those are like the two things she talks about to keep me interested in spending time with her.
According to the stories I've heard I decided I was a stuntman after my 6th shot of Jack
I just licked the seasoning off all the doritoes in the bag. Tell me when I should stop drinking or I'll just move on to the sunchips
Watching tv. She's giving me head and she hates it when I watch her.
Sarah likes to play this game where she leaves her thongs at every party. she hides them where hopefully gf's will find them. I caught her naked from the waste down in my freezer this morning
Nice. Don't spend your therapist's co-pay on Jaeger bombs.
You can drink as much as you want but it's not gunna make her forehead any smaller
I was hoping it might at least fix her teeth
If you're not peeing in public bi-monthly, you're not really living.
you started petting my head and said "there there, majestical unicorn. it won't be long before we get you back to neverland."
Oh yeah I remember when I first saw Kyler's balls. If there's anything high school swim prepared me for, it's the amount of testicles I would see here
I mean, you've seen me eat pizza, sober, out of a garbage can, and yet I refuse to go eat at that place. Just sayin....
I never thought I would encounter a situation that was "Too Gay" for me...and yet there I was.
I really regret not asking “like a cupcake” when you asked me to eat your ass
Randomize
