I hope my future cuntsucker is that tight
i think i have reached a jessica simpson level of regret
yeah but I shoulda known it\'d be bad when he start rubbing my pubic bone instead of the clit! Awkkkkwarddd
was it more than 30 minutes?
ya
then you're in a relationship
well,he told me "i bet you five bucks that i can right cum on the mirror with my cum" i said alright do it, lets just say he's five bucks richer...
Yeah i wasn't gonna go out but then i was like im not gonna get my dick wet stayin at home studying
Was just practicing flip cup with my NyQuil cup...
you were sitting on my toliet with a double cheesburger in your hand asking me how the cheeseburger even got there.
The problem with having your drunkeness documented at a wedding is not only does it show up all over facebook, but all over professional photography websites.
the ceiling is raining jello shotss
She wanted to roleplay. Apparently you be snow and i'll be a plow wasn't an option
Just bought shock top, Trojans, double shots and baby oil. At 8 am. While the lady in front of me bitched about her expired coupons.
My boobs are numb because I've been using them as stress balls
She came out of my bathroom wearing nothing but high top Converse, a leather jacket and a tongue stud. I love rock bars.
The internet was right. Snorting muscle relaxers is awful
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