I almost took home a boy from the bar last night, till i realized he was not speaking drunk, he was from another country and didnt know english. that could have been an awkward morning.
dollar beers will do that to you.
eating raw peppers to burn the taste of semen out of my mouth
You turned to me, asked if I was having fun yet, and then threw up onto my jeans. Thanks for the awesome first time partying experience
For his 21st I'm getting a fancy hotel that way he can at least sleep in a nice bathtub
It's blow job season.
I tried to find the bar, ended up at a car dealership. Then the alarms went off.
I walked home with him, but I had to pee...so I did...as we walked. He was so drunk he didn't even notice. Good thing I was in a dress.
Hold your horses dude. Titty pics are a work of art.
Way to go. Now you have no beer and I have a cold tit.
A thong just fell out of my purse in front of my whole class maybe I should stop using this morning class as my walk of shame
Remember when we made out in a Chik-Fil-A drive thru?
All I want is a wedding with a dress and a veil and where I can go and my cat can go.
sending my old camp counselor nudes. childhood memory win or new low?
Its weird to introduce me to his wife and kids on the first date, right?
I mean we all knew i was gonna get arrested eventually but shoplifting is lame so dont tell anyone. Well just let them assume public nudity or something
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