No. Please No. At first it was cool when you started bring an extra girl home for me but after 2 cycles of clap medicine I'm putting an end to it.
Just got a hand job during Charlie St.cloud I honestly never thought Id thank Zac Efron fir one of his movies but thank you
thanks for the 52 voicemails of you and crystal reciting the pleg of allegance
I tried...failed..now im naked on the futon since clothes are hard.
I take it that, because we are not guzzling a box of franzia, everything went alright?
Called my ex last night, told her I wanted to bang like we use too, her fiance was in the car, I was on speaker phone. NO MORE TEQUILA!
Did she say Ok?
What drugs are we doing when you visit?
The correct answer is all the drugs because I just found out they have glow in the dark bubbles.
I inhaled my own vomit, how was your night?
i want to platonically make out with them, platonically. in the back of this minivan
Why let a Christmas Eve hangover ruin a perfectly good Christmas Day acid trip?
I serenaded the cat in the hat for a few 90s songs but idk who he is
nothing like a long car ride to make you think of all the bad things you've done
I want to create a human. Discussion later.
I wish I just waited long enough to hate someone to fuck one
i looked at my texts in the morning and saw that i had a full conversation with myself via text thinking it was someone else. i rejected myself
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