false alarm. still invincible.
Can we progress our friendship to a point where i'm at least granted a blowjob allowance?
I walked into my house this morning to find an 18 pack on the counter. I think that's gods way of ringing the bell for round two.
That shit is worth it...they got medicine for that now a days
his mom gave me my lost underwear folded up along with the rest of my christmas present. tell me this cannot be happening.
he's measuring my pool to see how much jello powder he needs. He got paid today.
HE'S turngign 18teen real soon.k
Guy in the room next to us in the ER is chanting "I'm jeff and I'm drunk". He's trying to get released to finish tailgating for the Iowa game that starts in 9 hours.
I think my whole family judged my ability to change under a blanket.
In a moving vehicle and other people in the car
Yeah that doesn't involve enough booze, count me out
Yes, if by 'finishing my business' you mean vomiting in her bathtub and losing my watch.
yup and then I snapped out of it and realized I was playing beer pong against a 4 year old... and losing
Nothing like the judgmental looks you get in the bathroom when you still have last night's glowsticks on
I am the murdurer of this scooby doo episode
alright well you definitely hurt his feelings though you told him he looked like he was going to an Amish community prayer meeting..
Randomize
