I know it's VERY late and i know i may have burdened you, but on the chance that it's sat nite- are you up or willing to be? Christinas camping and i'm chillin alone.
but seriously ill do anyone in one of those hats with the earflaps.
I went back up to the apartment to get her phone and when I came back she was peeing on the sidewalk
Not quite sure what happened last night. I'll drive your dresser over to you later.....
i just sat down and hooked up with this girl. after she left i called over another girl and did the same. this happened about four more times and i never left my chair
This guy just tried to hit on me on facebook. His most recent listed education is middle school. This is my life.
im trying to look as sober as possible but i just poured orange juice and mayo into my milkshake.
I can't! Its just like the night that I bathed you, I didn't tell anyone.
It must suffice lest there secretly exist a picture of me walking out of the ocean at midnight naked and half mast with a sea urchin on my ass
I just did a shot of Jameson and two shots of cuervo. Note: this is the moment things went down hill
250 people in this lecture & my prof asks who already drank green beer this morning& is drunk right now. I WAS THE ONLY ONE TO RAISE MY HAND
Pretty sure we ruined a bachelorettes life last night
Its official. The summoning powers of my vagina are unmatched by anything in this world
Chasing down vodka with apple juice and crying. Alone.
so i was about to call you for your birthday but then i started making out with this guy... and i feel bad but i felt like you'd understand
Randomize
